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Is This Real? No Gifts for Christmas?


My heart breaks for Mary. After this past “happiest day of the year”, she posted a series of TikTok videos explaining about how she went all out to provide the “perfect” Christmas for her family after two years of “loss and sadness.” Unfortunately, her husband didn’t reciprocate. He didn’t give her any gifts. Not one. And this isn’t the first time either. What’s up with that?

MSN posted the story about how Mary lost her mother in 2021 and how she spent last Christmas on a ventilator at the hospital dealing with COVID. That ordeal caused her to lose her unborn baby. Knowing that it was up to her to make her kids’ Christmas special, she told her husband that they needed to go “make it up” for 2022. However, there was no gift under the tree for her.

While I can think of more constructive ways for Mary to vent her frustration, I totally understand her hurt. I can’t imagine doing that to my wife. But as sad as this story is, I was shocked by two other things that came out as a result of the story:

Some Women Don’t Understand

Currently, Mary’s TiKTok video has over 20,400 comments! While Mary got tons of support over the holiday from a lot of other women, there were some who just didn’t get it. One posted, “I don’t get this at all. I’ve never once felt sad Xmas day not having a gift. My son is my gift. I’m grateful for him.”

Another sort of rubbed it in Mary’s face, though I doubt that she meant to. She said, “I was quite lucky actually. I got an Echo Dot, some smellies, a Disney candle and some socks and pants.”

Others posted how they just go out and buy themselves their own gifts. One said, “Oh I had presents. I just picked them and wrapped them myself and he paid for them in the shop.” Another wrote, “I feel this today, so I went online and ordered a new LV purse. I’ll explain this to him when it arrives.”

Others stated how they and their husband don’t buy each other gifts but focus only on their children.

Mary is Not Alone

More often than not, the comments were mostly from other women who experience the same thing EVERY year:

  • “Nope. I’m that mom too.”
  • “Wow. I’m not alone.”
  • “Every. Damn. Year.”
  • “Accept or be disappointed every single birthday, anniversary and Christmas. It happens to the best of us.” (Posted with a smiley face.)

Guys is this true? As half of the human race, are we really this thoughtless? I’m sure some men are the breadwinners of the home and since they pay all of the bills, they think that they provide all the things that their wives “need.” But even so, doesn’t your wife need to know that she’s special and means the world to you? Could you at least buy her a card and tell her so?

Sure, there are a lot of women out there who just want a bunch of stuff and Christmas is just a time of expensive transactions. But for most, they would be happy if you just thought of her with something small. One women posted, “I don’t want much. A cheap pair of earrings or even a small box of chocolates. At least acknowledge me.”

I sort of understand those couples who only buy gifts for their kids. Nobody should feel that they are required to buy gifts for their spouse, but I disagree with this type of thinking as well. For one thing, Christmas should be a time when we think of others and that includes everyone in the household. For another, some of those kids will grow up thinking that they don’t need to buy gifts to anyone and the cycle will continue.

Guys, I’m sure that your wife knows that you love her, but do you respect her? If you think that your wife “knows” that she matters, but you can’t bother with a small token of appreciation and love, then you don’t know her at all. Don’t believe me? Ask her or she just might post her own story.

Main Image: Pexels/RODNAE Productions

Jeffrey Totey View All

I write about pop culture, arts and entertainment in the greater Seattle area.

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